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Dec. 1st, 2009 @ 02:57 pm song that makes me grin
Current listenings: Fuck you - Lily Allen
Look inside
Look inside your tiny mind
Now look a bit harder
Cause we're so uninspired, so sick and tired of all the hatred you harbor

So you say
It's not okay to be gay
Well I think you're just evil
You're just some racist who can't tie my laces
Your point of view is midieval

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause your words don't translate
And it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch

Do you get
Do you get a little kick of being slow minded?
You want to be like your father
It's approval your after
Well that's not how you find it

Do you
Do you really enjoy living a life that's so hateful?
Cause there's a hole where your soul should be
Your losing control of it and it's really distasteful

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause your words don't translate and it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch

Look inside
Look inside your tiny mind
Now look a bit harder
Cause we're so uninspired, so sick and tired of all the hatred you harbor

Fuck you
Fuck you very, very much
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch
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Nov. 16th, 2009 @ 03:45 am (no subject)
i'm officially on my way to vegas in mere minutes! see you all in a week!!!

-spiZ
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Nov. 13th, 2009 @ 08:14 pm (no subject)
You would not believe your eyes
If ten million fireflies
Lit up the world as I fell asleep
Cause they'd fill the open air
And leave tear drops everywhere
You'd think me rude but I would just stand and
Stare

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns, slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep
Cause everything is never as it seems

Cause I'd get a thousand hugs
From ten thousand lightning bugs
As they tried to teach my how to dance
A foxtrot above my head
A sock-hop beneath my bed
The disco ball is just hanging by a thread

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns, slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep
Cause everything is never as it seems
When I fall asleep

Leave my door open just a crack
Cause I feel like such an insomniac
Why do I tire of counting sheep?
When I'm far too tired to fall asleep

To ten million fireflies
I'm weird cause I hate goodbyes
I got misty eyes as they said farewell
But I'll know where several are
If my dreams get real bizarre
Cause I saved a few and I keep them in a jar

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns, slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep
Cause everything is never as it seems
When I fall asleep

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns, slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep
Because my dreams are bursting at the seams
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Oct. 22nd, 2009 @ 12:41 am work bummed
god dammit... i'm down to 8 hours in 2 weeks... joytv hasnt called me back... even pricesmart isn't willing to cooperate... FML... i have 2 weeks to find myself a job before money starts running dry

tomorrow i'm going to get my ass in gear. demo reel must be completed, resumes sent out, phone calls to several tv stations... and what sucks more is that the pirate bay has been permanently shut down so now i gotta find my own means of getting after effects cs4....

anyone out there need a graphic artist?

cyz;;
spiZ
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Oct. 3rd, 2009 @ 05:33 pm anyone?
anyone want to have thanksgiving with spiz this weekend? i'm not going to make it home for thanksgiving for the first time and it's really hard for me to cope with this... it would be nice if i could find some company to have thanksgiving dinner with on monday or saturday....

-spiz
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Sep. 21st, 2009 @ 12:09 am (no subject)
i'll come to you...

cyz;;
spiZ
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Sep. 9th, 2009 @ 11:36 am (no subject)
Hold me up in the palm of your hand
Lying to you is a river of sin
Your metaphores, your silent calls
Your feelings are too real
Let them spew, a fall from grace
Would do us good today

I'll lift you up, we can love or cry
Hey, I'm in love, I'll take you up again

All that to you in a church by the sea
We're late, but not in the same way
We're older today

I'll lift you up, we can love or cry
Hey, I'm in love, I'll take you up again
Your eyes have too many colours and I can only try
Your energy could be runnin' low, now
The juice is dry

Images we cannot leave behind
Like two riversides we roll back

Lift me up
In the palm of your hand
Lying to you is a river of sin
Your metaphores, your silent calls
Your feelings are too real
Let them spew, a fall from grace
With your love you had today
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Aug. 16th, 2009 @ 04:25 am quickie
a quick tidbit before i head off to PSF work

as of Oct. 5th, my contract with global will terminate. yup thats right. no more reliable income. i was supposed to be there for a year but the lady whose maternity leave i was covering, decided to come back 8 months early due to her husband losing his job.

A) i feel bad because she probably didnt want to come back so early, giving that it was only about 2 months worth of bonding with her new born baby
B) i'm upset because now my guaranteed hours are cut back and i have to swallow my dignity and crawl back to pricesmart for more hours... and it's back to the grind of begging for a job somewherez

anyone looking for a graphic artist?

-spiZ
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Aug. 11th, 2009 @ 02:58 pm averted
So drama averted and everything has been resolved again. It was quite a shitshow of a weekend that's for sure!  (see previous alcohol induced blogs)

I've realized that when put in the right situation, i get emotional when i've been drinking. And especially when i've drank that much rum!

Some news as of late:
- Saw Sam for the first time in weeks. We did our usual get high and just watch tv. I hung out with him til about 4 am then had to come back to burnaby. he got a new apartment in richmond. typical sam, total baller amazing apartment.
- Saw Nikki for the first time in weeks also. Went to ihop, hung out there for a few hours, had eggs benny and coffee then chilled at my apartment til i went to work. We both came to the conclusion we miss the crime ducks and should really make more of an effort to hang out.
- Work still continues. CHEK TV still slated to shut down in a couple weeks. A-Channel is hiring news reporters like mad. My job seems secure and i'm getting along really well with my coworkers. it's nice and i'm at a happy medium there
- Got evacuated from my building last night at 2:30am because someone pulled the fire alarm on the 17th floor. jerks!
- Got a new phone. Blackberry FTW
- Tomorrow I'm going to Tsawassen with vall so she can go to the island
- I've decided I am going to get a tattoo. of what, i'm not sure yet. once i decide, i'm going to get it done
- This weekend I finally get to meet travis after texting, talking, and msn'ing for 2 weeks. i think this might be a relationship again...
- I missed eve coming down to princeton last weekend because i had to work
- Worked a 6 day work week last week, with 8 hours stat and 14 hours OT. it will make for a handsome paycheck next payday
- I've been thinking of what will come of me after my contract terminates with global... i'm thinking of crazy things like going to japan for the summer to teach english or something... after long chats with friends i've decided that i want to do something spontanious and random because i feel i'm settling down too quickly and that i'm only 21 and i still have alot of living to do.
- Healthy living: not quite working out anymore. i've been trying and have cut down drasticly on the fast fod which my body has thanked me for. as for exercise, i've been failing at that which is lame because i think why i'm so tired is because my life lacks exercise.

Coming up:
- kidnapping brenda for the weekend on the 22nd
- going home to oliver on the weekend of the 29th

That is all! Drama averted and things are peachy again

-spiZ

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Aug. 4th, 2009 @ 02:19 am (no subject)
He wakes up
Rage and grace
Pulling me closer, pushing away
And me
The sharpest thorn on your vine
Twisting and turning
We’re all intertwined

Broken wing
Empty glass
Words that scream and bounce right back
He says, you know
We’d all like to rearrange

I wish I could fix you
And make you how I want you
I wish I could fix you
And I wish you could fix me

I wish I could heal you
And mend where you are broken
I wish I could heal you
And I wish you could heal me

A beaming sunrise buries the night
The setting sun destroys the light
Then he says, baby, I’ve gotta get going
Cutting each other
Without even knowing

He sees a million stars like holes in the sky
All God’s tears for him they cry
And I am in his rain
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Jul. 23rd, 2009 @ 12:30 am Day 3
So here we are... day 3 of being healthier... i missed day 2's blog about it so i'll fill you in now:

- went for a run on the treadmill for about 20 mins, died in a ball of sweat, then decided to walk to the grocery store and pick up all of my $100 worth of new healthier foods, which included fruit and veggies and multigrain everything. and for dinner i made some porkchops and spinach salad. thats about the extent of it

and as for today, i did about a half hour's worth of pushup and situps to get the ball rolling. and for lunch i divulged in tuna and spinach salad. for dinner i met with vall for mcdonalds but i had the grilled chicken sandwich instead of my usual double big mac combo. tomorrow i hope to wake up in time to be able to lift some weights and then do some laps in the pool afterwards.

and i've been slowing down on the coffee and smoking. trying to be healthy includes giving up the "cool" habits

in other news:

-CHEK TV in victoria is shutting down in august and CHBC in kelowna is being rebranded as Global Kelowna in september. also CHCA in red deer is being shut down too in august. local tv as we know it is changing

-i'm enjoying my job more and more. i'm making friends among my coworkers which is cool. things are on the up again i think

- the movie G Force (about the talking hamsters) looks absolutely fucking stupid and has made me throw up in my mouth to think people will spend money to see this

- the main actor from the new G.I. Joe movie without his shirt on, is incredibly hot

- i'm getting tired of guys saying how cool i am and how nice i am and seeing me a few times and then not really talking to me much after that. my love life has been on a dry spell again and i really want to end that with a good relationship again. alas, i need to get out and meet some nice guys

- this weekend holds some interesting events, such as landon's birthday party and hanging with eva. and the following weekend is pride so i'm stoked for that (STILL TRYING TO GET OUT OF WORK FOR IT!!! AUGH!!!)

and that's about whats happening in the world of justin lately.

cheers
spiZ
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Jul. 20th, 2009 @ 02:16 pm Day 1
Day 1 of my healthy kick-

So far I think i've failed day 1 because all I've wanted to eat all day was cookies and pizza (granted, the pizza is probably the best pizza i've ever eaten with goat cheese, 5 other cheeses, fresh and sundried tomatoes, whole wheat crust, and bacon ^_^). I didn't make it to the gym (stayed in my room and slept 3 more hours instead of gym'ing it up) and havent really moved away from my computer all morning (i can feel my eyes going square already)

But for break today, I plan on a healthy dinner of sushi and then this evening, I'll start my sit up routine again and them tomorrow morning i'm grocery shopping for healthy things and hitting the gym.

Today my main goal was actually to remove the campfire smell from my clothes before work. Camping turned out to be great actually. I managed to avoid contact with family members who annoyed me, and reconnected with some. And I got high every night i was out there with my younger bro and his gf. Twas good times. Swam in a cold lake, kayak'd.... and got the best redneck sunburn ever! Also managed go through about a dozen and a half beers all to myself over the period of 2 days.

This weekend is landon's bday party at brenda's house so I'll probably swing out that way sunday afternoon. and then the following weekend is pride which lisa and tams are coming in for.

Oh, and several wildfires out in kelowna have sparked up. 1 which is burning the area where i used to live many years ago when i lived in westbank (now called west kelowna). Hope all my family and friends are doing ok out there.

cheers;
spiZ
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Jul. 16th, 2009 @ 02:34 pm (no subject)
Current Location: Home
I'm feeling rather: hungry
Current listenings: Rusting in the rain - Billy Talent
so i've officially been living here for over a month now on my own. i will say, the novelty has yet to wear off which is awesome. i was worried that i was going to start going nuts by myself, but i'm out so much it's all good.

lately i've been reconnecting with old friends that were absent in my life during bcit. it's been cool to just be able to go see them again. jason and ashley, for example, actualy moved just down the lougheed hwy near brunette in coquitlam, so now they're just a drive away. also, some friends of mine from pricesmart live close by too so i've been having people over non-stop pretty much since i've moved in here.

this weekend is the good ol' minshull family reunion... my younger bro is bringing his gf and my youngest bro is bringing one of his friends... oi so that means once again, i'm stuck hanging out with my cousin no one likes... maybe i'll go force myself to third wheel with my bro and his gf. i'm bringing a few joints along so that i can make this family reunion more interesting. i might be driving vall to merritt to meet her sister too, so we shall see i might have company for most of the trip anyway.

a little side note: im very choked i'm missing No Doubt and paramore in concert for this family reunion. my friend had floor tix she wanted to sell me too!!! but i'm doing the family reunion thing instead... *facepalm*

also - nich is coming down this weekend. he and i will get to meet on sunday night, which will be nice because he's one of the few nice guys i've met lately who seem to be more interested in me then doing the nasty. (however, my dry spell is almost been a month now so i dont mind doing the nasty once and a while too)

my job is secure again. i've been given a project to do outside of work for a client at global. it's going to be my first client related project outside of bcit (besides my little one i did for brightlight pictures with ryan s.) and i feel really priviledged that my supervisor asked me to do it too... however, due to technical difficulties and computer issues and news hour final projects coming up, i couldnt get that one done. the client is the royal british museum and they are creating a week long contest and my job is basically to take the pictures they sent of artifacts and scale them down in photoshop and put them into Deko so we can air them during news hour, as well as putting their logo on there and backgrounds and a little trivia question... it's kind of cool and starts to air next monday. i got to use the macintosh after effect/photoshop suites at global. ^_^ i feel big league now

im pretty excited, speaking of old friends, for the pride festival coming up. my friends lisa, dave, and tammy are gonna come and stay with me for about 4 days for pride festivities. i'm excited because it's my first time going to pride and im going to be going with some people i havent seen for almost a year now. also - hoping to tag along with some friends from bcit for the festival too... any takers?

here's some point form tidbits about whats been going on lately in my world:
- just paid $500 in car repairs yesterday *facepalm*
- got my first ticket ever at a roadblock by the patullo bridge the other day in new west en route to a friend's bday party in surrey
- got pulled over prior to getting a ticket earlier last week on the barnet hwy while i was with vall. had 4 offenses but got off with a warning
- all this police activity has pushed me to book an apointment for a roadtest in burnaby in a few weeks
- i am determined to start going to the gym daily next week. this is my last week of being sedentary and eating fatty foods... next week i am going to start cooking at home and getting my gym on
- i'm not going to let being single bug me anymore
- i miss seeing my close friends from bcit. i feel that my work schedule conflicts with seeing them. especially when they all work in the same place and when i do see them, i cannot relate to all their new stores sans justin
- however, it is cool i'm making friends at work finally after being there since april. and seeing teachers from bcit working there is amusing me

ok so i'm hungry now... i think i'm going to go microwave some food and then make some coffee and get ready for work...

cyz;;
spiZ


 

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Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:31 am sooooooo
I'm feeling rather: tired
still no passport

this sucks....

im trying a new boy again. no more being stood up for me... silly aaron... he forgot he left his little big planet for ps3 here. so now it's mine ^^

this new boy's name is nick. he is awesome and great and yadda yadda yadda.... and he seems really intersted in me which is nice. he works for a hotel chain and right now is off on one of the gulf islands at a resort doing some temp work. he's coming back into town in a few weeks (the same weekend i'm gone to my family reunion) but i'm going to come bak early for him. he and i spent over 4 hours chatting online last night. he's just amazing

in other news, i have a family reunion coming up... ugh... i love my family to bits but i can only stand so much of the small town thing... last year i got the nickname "city-iot"... oi... it'll be a long weekend XP it'll be good to see some family but the extended family can get on my nerves

anyways! job security is still meh but i'm gonna roll with it as best as i can... pride is coming soon, gonna go to that... and yeah! nothing else really new

cheers;
spiZ
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Jul. 3rd, 2009 @ 02:24 am (no subject)
well i feel so stupid

HOW THE FUCK DOES ONE LOSE THEIR PASSPORT?!?!???

something so important AND I LOSE IT!!!

so much for seattle this weekend!!! UGH!!!! HOW DO YOU LOSE SOMETHING THAT IMPORTANT !!!!!!

if it's at my parents, i'm going to get even more mad as to WHY THEY HAVE MY IDENTIFICATION!!! it really should be WITH ME in case i need it...

EDIT: so it's not there... and now looking online at what to do if you've lost your passport, you have to file a claim with the rcmp, and with passport canada and then pay $87 to replace it.... ugh! damned moving so many times and losing crap

UGH!!!!

I punched several holes into my moving boxes that i searched through twice... i searched everywhere in my apartment for the last 3 hours with NO SUCCESS

I HATE GOVERNMENTS, I HATE "SECURITY", I HATE THE CANADIAN-U.S. BORDER, I HATE HOW IRRESPONSIBLE I AM AS TO LOSE MY OWN GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING PASSPORT

i'm going to hav a smoke

cyz;;
spiZ
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Jun. 27th, 2009 @ 01:40 am (no subject)
ugh

i got stood up
...

that just makes me feel so great about myself..

i hate people...

i'm going out to booze myself up and gamble

potentially jobless and relationshipless...

this calls for alot of weed and booze. huzzah
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Jun. 25th, 2009 @ 02:26 am what goes up
must come down...

i knew this was all too good to be true. i just fucking knew things were going too good for too long...

Canwest (Global TV's parent company) is in alot of financial trouble as most of you know... as of July 14th, I will most likely be out of a job... I got the grim news today from our union rep who said that to save money, Global is selling off its assets which include the E! Network franchise (CHEK Victoria, CHBC Kelowna, and CJNT Montreal) as well as CKMI Global Montreal. Which means that will render 1 of our 3 control rooms virtually useless... and will most likely mean, if there are any layoffs in the station, i'm one of the first to have their contract terminated...

this fuckin sucks...

i'm super bummed now. it's the waiting game. i have 2 weeks for a company to tell me i dont have a job with them anymore. which, y'know, wouldn't bum me out so much if i wasn't all of a sudden huge amounts of moneys in debt due to a new apartment and new lifestyle.

i instantly regret getting this place. and i guess i'll have to say goodbye to my dignity and go crawling back like a dog to the retail world...

but i'm going to try and remain optimistic that canwest won't do this... and that everything will be ok, even if we dump the affiliate stations...

i just think it's going to be a few nights without sleep... it's alot worse, y'know, getting a taste of what my life could be like and then having it all just ripped out of my hands like a poor kid holding a loaf of bread.

my parents said "well y'know, worse comes to worse, you just move back home"

*sigh* i wont let it come to that... i will NOT be moving back home

cyz;;
spiZ
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Jun. 23rd, 2009 @ 01:57 am hahaha
hahaha

boys suck XP

people in general suck too... super fake and mind games... i hate them so much. i just wanna be with someone who wants to be with me back... ugh...

oh well... i still have his ps3 game even if it's been over a week since we've seen each other and he doesnt answer my texts anymore...

i want to believe it's cuz hes busy with work and his phone is dead... but theres always that untrustworthy voice in the back of my head barking at me not to fall for it and that people suck and dont be naive...

i dunno... i think laura is interested but then again sometimes i dont...

rah...

so tired im dizzy

sleep now
__________

I stumble through the wreckage
Rusted from the rain
There's nothing left to salvage
No one left to blame
Among the broken mirrors
I don't look the same
I'm rusted from the rain
I'm rusted from the rain

Dissect me until my blood runs down into the drain
My bitter heart is pumping oil into my veins
I'm nothing but a tin man, don't feel any pain
I don't feel any pain, I don't feel any pain
I'm rusted from the rain

Go on crush me like a flower, rusted from the rain
Come on, strip me of my power, beat me with your chains
And if I'm the king of cowards, you're the queen of pain
I'm rusted from the rain, I'm rusted from the rain

You hung me like a picture, now I'm just a frame
I used to be your lap dog, now I'm just a stray
Shackled in a graveyard, left here to decay
Left here to decay, left here to decay

I'm rusted from the rain

Go on crush me like a flower, rusted from the rain
Come on, strip me of my power, beat me with your chains
And if I'm the king of cowards, you're the queen of pain
I'm rusted from the rain, I'm rusted from the rain

I'm rusted from the rain

Go on crush me like a flower, rusted from the rain
Come on, strip me of my power, beat me with your chains
And if I'm the king of cowards, you're the queen of pain
I'm rusted from the rain, I'm rusted from the rain

Go on crush me like a flower, rusted from the rain
Come on, strip me of my power, beat me with your chains
And if I'm the king of cowards, you're the queen of pain
I'm rusted from the rain, I'm rusted from the rain
The sun will shine again, I'm rusted from the rain
I'm rusted from the rain, the sun will shine again


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Jun. 20th, 2009 @ 05:13 pm ok so
haven't really had an update in a while... like an indepth one. so while i wait until my par-tay starts in like 2 hours, i'll just ramble off about shit that's been going on lately...

let's back track (i've been quite busy you see)...

so i've been out of school for about a month now. i co-op'd out early and my new job has been going quite swimmingly. i quite love my job, it's exactly what i've been wanting to do with myself. i love getting paid to make things look cool on the computer. i found though, that news has a lot of pressure in it. i recently saw the ratings for global's news shows that i do the graphics for (i do ALL the graphic work for the 5, 6, and 11pm news shows) and the amount of viewers is in the millions! millions of people get to see my graphics every day... its very intimidating yet so cool at the same time. i dread the day my 1 yr contract is over and that girl wants her job back...

and i'm all moved in. it was bittersweet leaving joyce and east vancouver behind to move back to the suburbs of burnaby. i'm wayyyyy out there though, i'm out on the border of coquitlam. a few blocks away is north road and the best korean bbq ever (insadong). it's great because i live next door to safeway, wal-mart, lougheed mall (avec starbuck's), london drugs and a liquor store. and right by the skytrain. i've finally unpacked everything and now am settling in nicely to my new home

i'm really excited because i dont ever have to leave this place (unless eviction happens). i've moved 3 times in the last 2 years. it's annoying and i hate moving so much. i'm glad to be settled now and i'm by myself which is another thing i've been waiting and waiting for. i love being around people but lately i've just wanted to be a hermit and be my anti-social self avec my tv and internets.

my parents came by for my grad, and they brought me a free couch (with cat hair) and a housewarming gift of a bbq!!! in addition, some bcit people put their moneys together and bought me a PS FUCKIN 3!!! i feel like i dont deserve any of this! YET AT THE SAME TIME, i love my new shit... i'm so materialistic...

it's been so long since good things have happened to me. i'm worried everything is going to go tumbling down soon... but for right now, i'm enjoying my life high.

speaking of getting high, yes it's my housewarming party tonight. im a little anxious since i havent held a party in a long time. i wonder who's going to show up, what's going to happen, if people will have a good time... i hope it turns out ok tonight. i'm confident. i just bought more rum so once that gets going, my anxiousness will just drip away

it's been a while, but i think i might be back in the dating game... i met this boy named aaron. i've been a little skeptical about him since our 2 dates we went on involved getting in bed together. and now he hasnt really said alot to me lately. it all makes me feel a little used but he started texting me again today which shows there might be something there. he's really cute too, skinny and blond. oh man do i love blonds

so all in all, that's about all that's news in my world... it's been GO GO GO for the past 2 years and i hope in the next couple weeks, things will wind down and slow slow slow down so i can have my lazy summer i've been craving and just being able to settle down, take a soak in my pool, come up and have a cool beer and watch a good movie. i need this down time. it's been so long since i've just been able to stop and watch the world go by.

some people crave this lifestyle but i've just found i'm really warn out and out of shape. the gym... oh yes the gym..... i cannot wait to get myself re-acquainted with the gym

anyhoo, ppl are now on their way over... so i'll update more later!!

cyz;;
spiZ
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Jun. 19th, 2009 @ 01:00 am (no subject)
I'm feeling rather: bummed
*sigh*

today went great. i'm exhausted. i'm a graduate now with an alumni pin. it was awesome

there was just one thing missing...

rather... one person


cyz;;
spiZ

::been missing you crazy... how do you sleep?::
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